Abnormal Drinking - Aug 14th

He is a drunkard who takes more than three glasses though he be not drunk.
~ Epictetus

A.A. Thought for the Day

"None of us like to think that we are bodily and mentally different from others. Our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove that we could drink like other people. This delusion that we are like other people has to be smashed. It has been definitely proved that no real alcoholic has ever recovered control. Over any considerable period we get worse, never better. There is no such thing as making a normal drinker out of an alcoholic." Am I convinced that I can never drink again normally?

Getting drunk on weekends was the norm for me growing up so naturally I developed this pattern myself by the time I was 17. I had no idea that this was abnormal - I looked forward to my weekends when I could get drunk. Gradually my drinking grew to include Sundays and I was always on the lookout for some occasion to authorize my drinking through the week. It was no surprise that by the end I was drinking most nights and was always feeling hungover when I was sober. I know now that that was abnormal drinking.

~ Mike

A Personal Relationship with your Higher Power

Few delights can equal the mere presence of One whom we fully trust.

~ George Macdonald

A.A. Thought for the Day

"We had but two alternatives; one was to go on to the bitter end, blotting out the consciousness of our intolerable situation as best we could, and the other was to accept spiritual help. We became willing to maintain a certain simple attitude toward life. What seemed at first a flimsy reed has proved to be the loving and powerful hand of God. A new life has been given us, a design for living that really works. All of us establish in our own individual way our personal relationship with God." Have I established my own relationship with God?

My relationship with my Higher Power is a force in my life for good, for positive change. My Higher Power gives life to my conscience, my hopes and is a constant reminder to me that life is a precious gift.

~ Mike

What is a "Higher Power"?

Beginnings:

AA sprang from The Oxford Group, a non-denominational movement modeled after first-century Christianity. Most Group members ("Groupers") were not concerned with sobriety, but some, such as Ebby Thacher, believed the group was a critical aid in staying sober. Following the Group's evangelical bent, Thacher sought out former drinking buddy Bill Wilson to tell him he was sober because he had "got religion." Thacher also told Wilson he could get sober too if he set aside his objections to religion and form a personal conception of God, "another power" or "higher power."

• Pass It On, p 117.
• Walter HA, Soul Surgery p. 44 Oxford: The Oxford Group
• Kurtz, Ernest (1980). Not-God: a history of Alcoholics Anonymous. Center City, Minn: Hazelden Educational Services. 

A.A. Thought for the Day

"There was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at our feet by Alcoholics Anonymous. By doing so, we have a spiritual experience which revolutionizes our whole attitude toward life, toward others, and toward God's universe. The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives there in a way, which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do for ourselves." Have I let God come into my life?

As you can see in the Thought for the Day (from Hazelden's "24 Hour a Day" published in 1954) the idea of a Christian God is prevalent throughout most writings regarding AA. I'm not sure why this makes me uncomfortable after being in the program for 15 years but it does. It's a troubling aspect of AA and the most common obstacle that newcomers stumble on. However without a new spirituality I'm sure that sobriety isn't possible for most. I pray to a Higher Power every day but stop short of recognizing the Christian God. I hope that this issue is never a roadblock in your recovery.
~ Mike

Loneliness - Aug 10th

“The most terrible poverty is loneliness, and the feeling of being unloved.”

~ Mother Teresa of Calcutta

I drank with strangers and treated them as friends so that I could live the illusion of having friends. They were doing pretty much the same thing, hanging out with people they didn't know. We were bonded together by our drinking and our loneliness. I hated going home to an empty apartment or house. I lived alone for years and before I got sober I was never comfortable with myself. Now when I am alone it's because I choose to be and it is solitude and solitude allows me to meditate and relax. I have no excuse to be lonely now and the program of AA has allowed me to make friends with people from all walks of life. I no longer feel lonely and I have sobriety and AA to thank for it.
~ Mike

Psychic Change - Aug 9th

Change before you have to.
~ Jack Welch

A.A. Thought for the Day

"We have an allergy to alcohol. The action of alcohol on chronic alcoholics is a manifestation of an allergy. We allergic types can never safely use alcohol in any form at all. We cannot be reconciled to a life without alcohol, unless we can experience an entire psychic change. Once this psychic change has occurred, we who seemed doomed, we who had so many problems that we despaired of ever solving them, find ourselves able to control our desire for alcohol." Have I had a psychic change?

Alcohol was always on my mind when I was drinking. Like the Big Book says - I was restless, irritable and discontented anytime I didn't have alcohol. Today that thinking is completely foreign to me.
~ Mike

Miracles - 07 Aug

“Out of difficulties grow miracles.”
~ Jean de la Bruyere

A.A. Thought for the Day

We in A.A. are offering an intangible thing, a psychological and spiritual program. It's a wonderful program. When we learn to turn to a Higher Power, with faith that that Power can give us the strength we need, we find peace of mind. When we re-educate our minds by learning to think differently, we find new interests that make life worthwhile. We who have achieved sobriety through faith in God and mental re-education are modern miracles. It is the function of our A.A. program to produce modern miracles. Do I consider the change in my life a modern miracle?

Every day of sobriety is a miracle and every miracle a gift.
~ Mike

Balance - 06 Aug

Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance, order, rhythm and harmony.
~ Thomas Merton 

Balance for me has been about avoiding drama, working on my relationships (especially with my higher power). Not drinking & going to meetings. Speaking up when something pisses me off - without losing my temper. Giving more than is asked of me and looking after my own needs. The last 5 years has given me the opportunity to share my journey with 2 step-kids and having kids in my life has granted me a wonderful and fresh perspective. I like moments of solitude but have learned to shun isolation. I probably should be more physically active and I should eat better but I feel that I've found emotional and spiritual balance in my life and I'm truly grateful for that. Perfect balance isn't possible but progress towards a more balanced life is a worthwhile daily pursuit.

~ Mike